How do we continue to create and lead when we are in crisis?
I wanted to be transparent around this space, both because I am in it and because it is something that I often get asked about by clients that are also in it.
Whether we are in a health crisis, or natural disaster, or emotional or mental crisis, it can be hard to feel functional while we are in that space.
I have had in the last 6 years, a few times of being in crisis.
As someone who is self-employed, I don’t have the luxury of taking months off at a time or going on stress leave as I have lots of bills to pay.
My “job” is also reliant on me, I can’t really pass it on to anyone else to cover for me when I am in crisis mode.
In 2016 after I bought the ranch I faced the first significant health crisis I have ever had. My adrenals crashed and I was fatigued and living through burnout, which wasn’t enough to knock some sense into me so I needed a trample from one of my horses to do it.
What my health crisis taught me was that I had to change how I held myself, building a foundation of ritual and self-care that was an everyday practice, because if I didn’t tend to me, no one would.
This is a mentality I still hold now, that I really do think has helped me find some semblance of stability through living through wildfires.
If we have a foundation of self-support, when we are in crisis we have something to hold us, living through self-abandonment has been one of the most important things to have for me.
Knowing what I need to tend to myself, my body, my spirit, mind, and emotions on a daily basis and doing a check-in is essential and important whether I am in crisis or not.
Learning how to hold space for self, is going to bolster you through when you need it so that is the first space.
How do you tend to your own energy? Your own emotions? Your inner spaces on a daily basis?
How are you creating space in your life currently to hold that? This is both a practice and a mindset.
The second is this, giving ourselves time to truly be in recovery, helps us and to listen to what our recovery needs to be.
I understand and I don’t want to minimize when we find ourselves in significant places of crisis that we need more recovery time, because that is true.
We are the only ones that know what we need.
For example, I knew that last week and this week I needed to not be “working” or holding space for clients because I needed that recovery time and tending to myself and my herd through our stress and trauma of moving and evacuating last week, also orienting myself to having an out of control fire burning across the road.
I have been listening not to when my mind wants me to come back, but my energy and body, giving it space and pause it needed and not worry about it.
I naturally am feeling good about stepping back into my coaching next week and capable of doing that.
When we are in tune with our rhythms we can give ourselves and be present to the space we need without rushing it or feeling guilty about it, which depletes us and means we can’t really tend to ourselves.
So my intention and focus has really been about that deep listening and honoring of my system, lots of naps, and taking the space to tend to what I needed.
I also leaned into my community, received some healing sessions for myself, knowing my system had some trauma, and got help. We need to get ourselves supported as much as we need it when we are in these spaces and know that it is a worthy and essential investment.
And then this piece….
My connection to my spirituality is an essential place of nurturing for my own well being and…it also really helps for me to access that connection in my work.
Our spirit, our soul is not always having the same experience as our human selves, so I know that even though a part of me is in crisis, I can count on my connection to source and my spirit to hold space for others.
It is not dependent just on me, so there is a ritual I have to connect to that part of me around where I am tending to myself in crisis that helps.
Also this…
We are humans, we are not robots, we still have the wisdom to share even when we are moving through it.
My approach is to be authentic about what I am moving through and hold space for myself so I can show up for others.
If I was neglecting myself, or not being present to what I needed then yes I wouldn’t probably be able to hold space for others.
So this is really important and I don’t really think anyone expects us to not be going through something or that takes away from our ability to show up.
In fact, I have found the opposite, I find that being in crisis or moving through things gives me the ability to connect and relate to my clients in a better way.
It is also ok, for us to be in our mess and still be able to hold space for others.
When I am in crisis I might need to make more space for myself, to tend to my own spaces, to take space and pause between sessions, so I listen to what that looks like.
I have also created a practice of authenticity and spaciousness, and giving room to that life is life and I might have to work around that sometimes.
This is how we can manage and create and lead while we are moving through something.
Honor yourself and what you need, put that first, know you still have wisdom when moving through something.
Build your foundation and strength to your inner source and to your own energy every day and with consistency and you will have that to fall back on when you need it.
Be kind to yourself, give yourself space and room, and permission when you need it to honor your process, listen to your own energy but know you have what you need within you and with the source to create and lead while being in a place that feels shaky.
And always honor what feels true to you.
Hope this was helpful.
Love your mentor and guide,
Hillary
