You were not born to be popular...

Something came to me tonight after I received an email in my inbox…

You were not born to be popular.
You were born to make a difference.

In the email I read about an invitation I was being given to speak about my work with the horses from a perspective of the impact they have, and another layer that I don’t often speak about all the time: where my horses come from and what happens to the ones that don’t find homes such as my own.

In my own quest for purpose I knew and have held a clarity that there was going to be layers and depth to the voice and impact that I felt called to have, both in having the courage to be authentic in my work with my clients and in the spaces I held with the horses.

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One of the biggest fears I have had to overcome, and I know that I hold space for, is the fear of being seen, or judged, being visible and showing up in our true authenticity.

Because we are afraid of not being accepted, or liked, loved or embraced, we delude ourselves, quiet our voices or conform to what we think is going to make us popular.

But here is the thing: the point to our purpose and to ourselves is not to be popular. We wouldn’t find fulfillment there anyways.

It is to make a difference, an impact, a shift, to inspire and to encourage by being brave enough to lead through our hearts, what is held deep down in our spirit and through the voices of our message.

Once upon a time it used to be really hard for me to write.... Copy, content, newsletter... I would spend hours sitting in front of a screen or my journal wondering what I was going to say.

The truth was it wasn’t that I didn’t know what to say. It was that I was terrified of how it would be received.

Would I be judged by being too out there?

Would people make fun of me?

There was also this one...

As someone who prides herself on being a peacekeeper and not a boat rocker, I was afraid that anything too bold would create controversy or people being upset with me.

And years spent bottling up my voice and my message was painful.

The anxiety that I held in me was not due to the fear but to the fact that I was not allowing what wanted to flow through me to come out.

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Here is the thing that we forget...

We are not speaking to the ones that won’t resonate to what we are saying, or will get it, or will want to hear what we have to say.

We are speaking to those that are meant to be moved by us, that are waiting to hear what we have to say, that will find value and inspiration for it and that we will make a difference for.

We put so much time and effort worrying about the wrong audience and forgetting the whole other side of the coin.

And here is another truth...

At the end of the day, or at the end of your life when all is said and done…

Are you going to wish you were more popular, or are you going to wish that you could have done something more?

Will you be satisfied knowing there were people who seemed to follow you because you fit to what they wanted you to be?

Or that your words made a difference to someone who heard you speak thorugh your authenticity?

I know which one I would choose.

We are not born to be popular, whatever that even means.

We were not born to conform to hide our authentic self and message within us.

We were not born to be silent, or to be still, to not create waves in the world, or a ripple effect with our impact.

We were born to make a difference.

To share the uniqueness of our song and our medicine.

To be brave and courageous in speaking up when we are called to.

To use the words and language of our heart and soul to bring greater beauty, clarity and inspiration to the world.

To heal and to be bold because sometimes it requires us to be that way.

Before I took a dose of my own medicine once more to write something that may in some ways rock a boat or two, I walked out to my field to visit my horses.

The ones that I do this for, that continue to lend me the courage and the strength to stay true to my heart and vision and where I am being asked to lead.

And I sat down and watched…

And I reminded myself of this, of what I have come to know over the last couple of years when I have gotten braver and braver about sharing my heart and my words with the world.

And here is the kicker to my own amazement to a growing community and tribe that continue to thank me for inspiring their way with shares and with pieces like these that I write.

So all of those fears, of whether they will like me or not, or whether I would be accepted or loved for who I was, where I was terrified of taking a stand, of giving myself permission to give space to what was wanting to flow through me....

... was a lie.

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And as I continue to do my best to move past the points of my own discomfort I tell myself this, again and again and again:

This is not a popularity contest. This is about being true to who I am in the world, what I feel called to hold space for and the honoring of my purpose.

And trusting and knowing there is an audience and an impact that is waiting for it.

That is who I am speaking to.

A reminder to you as well and an encouragement...

To use your voice, to share what is in your heart, for yourself, and for the impact you have yet to discover you will have when you find the courage to do so.

Love,
Your coach and guide,
Hillary

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